Thesis Redo and Starting Process Paper

Here is the two examples of good thesis:

Example #1

The Soviet ballet dancers took a huge risk when standing up for their rights because their careers were at stake. The Soviet ballet dancers were mad that the Soviet Union did not treat them fairly. They wouldn’t let them leave the county and didn’t give them respect. The ballet dancers took action by refusing to go on with the group or they defected to other countries outside of the Soviet Union.

What is the argument is that person trying to make? 

NHD projects should do more than just tell a story. Every exhibit, performance, documentary, paper and website should make a point about its topic. To do this, you must develop your own argument of the historical impact of the person, event, pattern or idea you are studying. The point you make is called a thesis statement. A thesis statement is not the same as a topic. Your thesis statement explains what you believe to be the impact and significance of your topic in history. 

Example # 2:

 The battle of Gettysburg was a major turning point of the Civil War. It turned the tide of the war from the South to the North, pushing back Lee’s army that would never fight again on Northern soil and bringing confidence to the Union army.

What is the argument is that person trying to make? 

Also with revising your thesis statements you all should be starting your process papers. Links on examples of a Process Paper are HERE 

Click on the orange exhibit button and there are examples after you scroll down.

I will ask for a revised thesis when we get back from break!